Victor or Victim? You Choose!

Either we allow ourselves to become a victim to other people's decisions, words, and actions or we can choose to live a victorious life free...

Everyone of us have had tragic things happen in our life. Sometimes life just isn't fair.  We have all been let down or hurt by others.  Many times those who are the closest to us hurt us the most. I think this is because we expect perfection out of the people who are the closest to us even though we know no one is perfect. People don't always make the right choices. People don't always do what we would like for them to do or think they should do. When these things happen we have a choice to make. Either we allow ourselves to become a victim to other people's decisions, words, and actions or we can choose to live a victorious life free from the chains of offense. The choice is ours. Here are three keys to help you stay clear from being victimized and secure a healthy, victorious life in God.

1) Forgive always

There is never a time that un forgiveness can be justified.

 “Then Peter came to Him and said, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.”

Matthew‬ ‭18:21-22‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

Jesus is pretty much saying we are to forgive always. I once heard someone say,  "not forgiving someone is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die." Grudges are like parasites. They never contribute to someone's life only take it away.

Many people have trouble moving forward due to them always looking back. Choosing to hold on to an offense is choosing to carry around a weight that you were not designed to carry. The bible teaches us to cast our cares on Jesus for He cares for us. Jesus is the one that was designed to carry burdens not us. These weights get heavier with time and can ultimately crush the life out of those who hold on to them.

Not too long ago we had a prayer day at our church. We designed a prayer journey that consisted of seven stations for people to walk through. The second station had a cross at it. At this station everyone was challenged by scripture to forgive offenses. As a step toward forgiveness, people were encouraged to write any offense they may have on asticky note and place it on the cross symbolizing them placing this care on Jesus and leaving it with Him.

As I was standing in the foyer someone I love dearly came out after just a short time in prayer with tears in their eyes. I asked them what was wrong and if they were going to finish the prayer journey. This person looked at me and said they couldn't. I was astonished of why they would not be able to finish a prayer journey so I asked why. This person told me they had made it to station two but couldn't move on because they had an offense they were not ready to let go of.

I did my best to encourage this person to be obedient to the Lord. The Holy Spirit was trying to take this thief of bitterness from this lady and give her joy and rest but she chose to hold on to it instead. She left that day hurting and burdened. I was saddened by her decision. She had bought into a lie. The offense was disguising itself as a security blanket for her. She thought it was protecting her from getting hurt again, in actuality it was robbing from her of joy, peace, and healthy relationships. I'm excited to say, this lady later on made the decision to forgive and is free today of that weight she was carrying.

Don't let bitterness rob from you one more day. Don't allow your self to be a victim of the past never moving forward to the beautiful future God has for you! Give God those heavy weights by forgiving everyone of all offenses! Be victorious!

2) Face the truth

I minister to people all the time who have this victim mentality. You know what I'm talking about. Those people who think no one likes them and everyone is against them. The people who think they always get the short end of the stick. The people who think it is someone else fault for their bad decisions. You know those who believe the world owes them something for nothing. This mentality is one of a beggar not a child of God.


One of the first commands God gave Adam and eve in the beginning was to subdue the earth (Genesis 1:28.) This means he was wanting them to conquer the earth, to bring it into subjection to their leadership . He created us to rule and reign on the earth. It is Gods plan for all of us to prosper in every way. He desires for us to be blessed so we can be a blessing. He wants us to be lenders not borrowers.


The welfare system was never God's idea. EBT cards are not God's best. In Christ the blessing of Abraham has been made available to whosoever will. Abraham had the favor of God and was very wealthy. God doesn't want his children hopeless and helpless depending on other people's abilities and success for provision. This is not leading. I wouldn't call this ruling and reining. This is bondage and slavery by choice. This is laziness. This is having a false identity. This is settling for handouts. This is the world's way of living and seeing.


It is gods will that no one perish but comes into the saving knowledge of his son Jesus Christ. It is God's desire that everyone becomes a son or daughter of his by putting their faith in Jesus Christ. Most Christians I know struggle through life because they don't know their true identity. In order to learn who God has created you to be and what He had ordained you to have you must look into His mirror which is the Bible. Your mind has to be renewed by God's word so you can see Him, yourself, and your world from the right perspective. His perspective.


“For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.
‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭23:7‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

You must begin to see yourself how God sees you. You will never rise above how you see yourself.  If you continue to see yourself as a victim; you will always be a victim. If you see yourself as poor; you will always be poor. If you see yourself as being sick; you will always be sick. If you think everyone is against you; you will always be isolated from others. Reprogram the way you think by reading the bible and watch God transform your life! When you do this you will find out how good God really is. You will discover how loved you really are.


3) Focus on your vision


"Vision is the ability to see farther than your eyes can see!"

When you don't have vision you end up becoming a product of someone else. Vision brings focus and alignment to your life. Vision is the remedy to distractions and the seed to energy.


God, as the author of your life, has already written the blueprint. You are not to create your purpose but discover it. As you acknowledge God in your every day living He will reveal himself and direct your path. The more time you spend with God the more you will become like him. It is in his presence that His desires become yours.


“Delight yourself also in the LORD, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.”
‭‭Psalms‬ ‭37:4‬ ‭NKJV‬

It is the person who delights themselves in the Lord that gets their desires because their desires are the Lord's. If this is the case, your desires can serve you like a GPS system serves a car. Your desires connect you to your purpose in life. They reveal what you enjoy, your passions, and uncover your gifting.


If you don't allow God to give you vision for your life you will always be a victim to other people's desires for you. You will become a puppet in the wrong hands. If you don't have vision to keep your eyes looking forward you will be tempted to look backwards always moving in circles.


“Then the LORD answered me and said: “Write the vision And make it plain on tablets, That he may run who reads it. For the vision is yet for an appointed time; But at the end it will speak, and it will not lie. Though it tarries, wait for it; Because it will surely come, It will not tarry.”
‭‭Habakkuk‬ ‭2:2-3‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

It is so important not to just internalize your vision in your heart only. You need to write your vision down and look at it often, daily if necessary. This will keep you looking in the right direction and help you eliminate distractions as they come. This will also give other people an opportunity to see what you are trying to accomplish and join the team.


Do you have vision for your life? What has God given you to accomplish? What Are you believing God for? What do you want to accomplish by the end of the week, month, year? Answering these questions will help you find vision and God's purpose for your life!

B. Burnam